The Lifeline by Tom Ellen

If I learned one life lesson from Tom Ellen’s lovely romance novel, it’s that I’m not the only one who has a weird celebrity crush on Richard Ayoade. What a relief! Usually I get quizzical looks and awkward questions when I admit this, so I felt vindicated. I often say I don’t like romances, but I really did enjoy this story about Annie and Will. They met one day in Paris when Will’s band The Defectors were the next up and coming Indie band. Annie is sent out to interview them before a gig and hits it off with cute frontman Will Axford, who I was imagining as my Indie crush Damon Albarn. Annie finds his floppy hair, dimples and the gap between his front teeth very sexy. He seems to be clicking with her, but she’s still surprised when he catches up with her after the interview and suggests they spend the day together. Later as they watch the sunset from the Pont Alexandre III bridge, he asks if they can meet after his gig on the same spot. So, Annie is standing there at 11pm waiting for Will to arrive but when he still isn’t there at 11.30pm she gives herself a good talking to, fancy falling for the patter of a rock star. He’s probably with another girl already or tries this on every girl he meets. How stupid to think he would genuinely like her! As she pays for an extortionate last minute hotel room on her credit card, she’s already mentally writing up her interview full of anger and disappointment.

Fast forward five years and Annie works for an internet magazine, one of those that suck us into a blur of 1980’s celebrities and what they look like now or the best ever one hit wonders. It’s not what she wanted to do when she started out, with a pile of short stories and novel proposals, but it pays the bills and she loves her colleague Lexi. So, when she’s asked by her boss to write a new “Where Are They Now?’ series to go with some very lucrative advertising revenue, she jumps at the chance to do something more interesting. Then her boss asks her to track down The Defectors. Behind the scenes Annie is having a hard time. Her father died just over a year ago and her different approach to his cancer diagnosis has left her estranged from her mother and sister. Her live-in boyfriend Dom isn’t her dream man, they’re just muddling along while friends are making huge life changes like marriage and baby. The thought of losing Dom or her job scares her, but maybe a big change is exactly what she needs? As she tries to track down The Defectors she sees one of them has shared a phone number on a black background, which stands out in the usual technicolour of Instagram. It’s for a lifeline called Green Shoots, a listening ear for those who are bereaved, anxious and lonely. Annie needs someone to listen to everything that goes round in her mind, so decides to call using her middle name Pia. When Jack answers she finally feels she can open up.

Jack volunteers at the lifeline as often as he can but he doesn’t use his real name. Of course he has regulars and I fell in love with these callers, perhaps because they reminded me so much of my own work in mental health. Work I’m not well enough to do at the moment. I understood that fondness for certain callers, because it’s hard to avoid clicking with people, however we meet them. There’s Eric who calls and often makes hilarious commentary on whatever he’s watching. Some of these programmes, despite his advanced years, are things like Love Island and Made in Chelsea. I fell in love with him straight away and those times when he called feeling low I was heartbroken. Then there’s the breathing lady, who calls just to have someone to breathe with, until she feels calmer. Jack and Pia hit it off on the phone straight away, there’s energy between them. So when she says she’ll call back, he finds himself looking forward to her call. I really felt for Jack because working with people and their deepest emotions can forge strong connections, it’s hard to be detached from some callers. I loved that his friend and colleague Tanvi felt the same way too. He had been avoiding the get togethers and catch ups with other volunteers, mainly because he’s struggling with making friends and being social. Years before, there was a friend that Jack wished he could have been there for and he finds the guilt is crippling.

I felt for Annie too, especially her journey through grief and the struggle to cope when her father was diagnosed with terminal cancer. The author presents beautifully how even the closest people can grieve in their very different ways. There’s a need to give each other space and respect what they need to do in order to cope. It’s so hard when someone is terminally ill and perhaps their wishes don’t align with our own. It’s hard to let go of someone we love, even when we know they’re ready. I thought the author paced the story perfectly and the misunderstandings on the road to romance were believable, rather than formulaic ones that sometimes make me groan in romance novels. I really liked and understood these characters, so I was truly into their story and didn’t notice the romance tropes as much. Equally, I loved the revelations along the way, because as Annie found more dead ends in her search for Will Axford and his band, I began to wonder whatever did happen to him? This was a thoughtful, bittersweet novel about love and the people we lose along the way, and I read every word hoping our two main characters would find each other.

Out now from HQ

Meet the Author

Tom is an author and journalist from London, England. He is the co-writer of three critically acclaimed Young Adult novels: LOBSTERS (which was shortlisted for The Bookseller’s inaugural YA Book Prize), NEVER EVERS and FRESHERS. His solo adult debut novel is the romantic comedy ALL ABOUT US (HQ/HarperCollins, published October 2020). His books have been widely translated and are published in 20 countries. He is a regular contributor to Viz magazine, and has also written for Cosmopolitan, Empire, Evening Standard Magazine, The Daily Mash, Glamour, NME, ESPN, ShortList, Time Out London, Vice, Stylist and many more.